The Only Wish
by echaryn
Summary: Sabo hates his birthday. With a passion. People congratulating him, all the birthday wishes, the unwanted gifts - he loathes it, if he could he would just hide away in his room and avoid everyone. After all, what he wishes for...will never come true, no matter how much he wants it...
**Hi everyone,**

 **this story was first posted by me on AO3 on 20/03/16.**

 **March 20 - Sabo's birthday!.**

 **Happy birthday, Sabo!**  
 **This fic is for all the Sabo fans out there, who love the blond rogue just as much as I do :)**

 **Enjoy!**

 **I don't own One Piece nor any of the characters.**

* * *

"Ah, Sabo-kun! Wait up!" he hears the voice of his fellow revolutionary call his name and he stops walking, half turning around to Koala, who is hurrying up to catch up with him. He's on the way to his sleeping quarters; he desperately wants to avoid seeing anyone after midnight. Which is in about 40 minutes.

As soon as he looks in her face, he knows exactly what's up. And he isn't in the mood for it _one bit_.

He wishes she would just leave it be; by now she should know that he hates his birthday more than any other day of the year, in fact he _loathes_ his birthday with a passion.

Because… a birthday is supposed to be celebrated with your loved ones. So far, so good, it's tradition, right, most people try to celebrate with family and friends. But on this special day…it just reminds Sabo of what kind of incredible assholes gave birth to him. That his brother is dead. And that the other one is some place far away, hundreds and hundreds of seamiles from Baltigo, so far away he might as well be on another goddamn planet…

His mood darkens when he thinks about the following day. He dreads being treated as special, he dreads the countless birthday wishes hailing down on him like a series of never-ending punches to the gut and most of all he hates that he will have to force a smile on his face for the entire 24 hours until his damn cheeks will go numb, because he's supposed to be happy, right, it's his birthday, he's a year older, one year closer to dying, and he's supposed to be happy and show a smiley face when in reality he just wants to be left alone and get the day over with as quickly as possible…

God, how much he wants to throw up…

"Ne, Sabo-kun, what are you planning for tomorrow?" Koala asks him cheerfully. As usually, she's waaaay more enthusiastic about his birthday than he could ever be.

"Nothing much, to be honest, let's all keep it casual, yeah?" he replies politely.

"But it's your birthday!"

"Yeah, and yet it's like every other day of the year, hm?" he says with a wink. "Nothing special, Koala."

"But…everyone else thinks it's special," she pouts, "Because it's _you_ after all."

He sighs. He doesn't want to spoil his friends' motivation, either, he will be in a bad mood anyways, so no need to rain on everyone else's parade…

"So what do you want for your birthday?" Koala asks intrigued and looks at him.

"Uhm…"

"Because we all want you to enjoy tomorrow, ok? So tell me what you wish for," she smiles and Sabo blinks, a…a long forgotten sadness tugging at his heart…

"That's really sweet of you, Koala. But I just wish for everyone to just keep it casual and that you guys let me sleep in," he says jokingly, although hoping he'll be able to avoid his folks at least until noon, if everyone thinks he just sleeps in…

"Yep, will do!" she grins.

"Great."

"Alright, then I'll tell everyone! See you tomorrow!" she chirps and pulls him into a bone-breaking hug.

"Ah, yes, thanks Koala."

"Good night!"

"Good night."

As he finally lies down in his bed, he feels exhausted, although he has literally done nothing to become exhausted from.

And the exhaustion just fuels the bad mood that starts blooming beautifully in his stomach, the darkening cloud that wraps around his head, colouring his thoughts darker with each passing minute closer to midnight…

"Fuck this…," he mutters to himself, angrily turning to his side, staring at the blank wall in front of him. This is so stupid… His brows furrow as he shuts his eyes tightly, trapping his vision in the soothing darkness, and he wants his mind to shut down, too, but no…

The darkness is the perfect screen for his eager brain to project on – and hell, it's like his head has become his own personal enemy, showing him everything…everyone…he wants to see… everything…he has ever truly wished for…

Although fully aware that he can't have it, never.

Impossible.

He sees Ace, right in front of him, he can see Ace smile at him, it's Ace as an adult, it's the face he knows from the papers, because Sabo has never actually met him as an adult…

It starts hurting in his chest as he sees the foreign and yet so familiar freckled face light up in a grin, and Ace nods at him approvingly, as if saying: _You made it this far, good job_ , and Sabo thinks he actually hears his voice…although he has forgotten already how his voice sounded as a kid...it would be darker now, right? The voice of a grown man...

And suddenly, there's Luffy, right next to Ace, and has Luffy always been this short, compared to Ace? Luffy grins at him and waves eagerly, his grin so similar to Ace's, his hair the same kind of untamed, raven mess. And now Sabo can see where they are – it's the cliff, outside of the Wind Mill village, the cliff from where you have the most brilliant view over the East Blue, it's Goa Kingdom…it's…it's his _home_ …

He stares at his brothers, he can see them yelling and waving, but he doesn't understand a thing they're saying. C'mon, they don't stand that far away, yell a bit louder! Or maybe it's the wind up here, tugging at his clothes, as if pushing him toward the sea...

"Wh-what?" he yells after a moment, and Luffy and Ace look at each other, shrugging in confusion.

"What are you saying?!" Sabo yells, louder this time, and suddenly he feels a hand on his back, gently pushing him forward.

He looks over his shoulder, and he sees Dadan – good old Dadan, oh my god, she's gotten more wrinkles – and she's grinning.

"Go, they're waiting for you," she says in her smoky cigarette-voice and he stares at her and suddenly, his gaze drifts downward, to the shore and he sees…

"What…whose…whose ship is that?" he asks weakly, suddenly feeling this strong pull…in his chest…the longing that has been buried for so long… It's a beautiful ship, with snow white sails that seem to glow in the bright sunshine, it looks...like the ship is just _waiting_ to sail away...

"I think it's yours," Dadan mutters and then she shoves him forward, toward his brothers.

"Hurry up, Sabo!" Luffy yells and now he can hear him, his voice is as loud and clear as ever, and Sabo blinks, he's confused, he doesn't have a ship…

"Hurry up your ass, or someone will find One Piece before us!" Luffy shouts with a laugh ringing in his words and Sabo gaps at them, probably looking really stupid and he can see how Ace nods toward the ship. _C'mon, Sabo, we're ready to set sail…_

"But…I'm…I can't," he says weakly.

"Yes you can! We're pirates!" Luffy shouts.

"But…"

"Just go, now, Sabo, you gave us twelve years of your life. It's time for a new adventure," he hears a female voice and there's Koala, grinning at him, from ear to ear, and she teeters happily on her feet.

"But…you guys…"

"We'll come by. And we'll see each other again, right?"

"Koala…"

"Now go, your brothers are waiting for you. Go be a pirate. It's what you always wanted, huh?"

"…Yes, but…"

"Now go, you big dork. And tell me all about your adventures when we meet again," she laughs and gives him a nod and another shove toward Ace and Luffy, who are still patiently …or maybe not so patiently… waiting for him.

"Sabo!" Luffy yells again, at the top of his lungs, but Sabo…still hesitates…

"This is too good to be true…," he says, more to himself, although ever single cell in his body is _screaming_ to run to his brothers, to set sail, to let the adventure begin…the adventure that should've been theirs from the beginning, to chase the dream that should've been theirs, to live their lives in freedom, the way they always wanted, before fate happened...

And yet, something holds him back…

"Sabo. It's ok. You can go," Koala says softly behind him.

"But…"

"It's what you wished for, right?"

"Yes, but… this isn't _real_ , Koala…"

"Why not?"

"Because… Ace is…"

"Sabo, he's standing right there. He's waiting for you."

Sabo searches Ace's gaze and his brother smiles at him, the way he would smile at him all these years ago, when they were still children…

"They're both waiting for you. Now go."

And finally he moves his feet, and he starts running, running as fast as he can, toward the two people that mean most to him in the entire world…

And he falls into their welcoming arms and their hugs are solid, bone-bracking, pressing all air from his lungs, and so real, the heat, the smell of the ocean on their skin, Luffy's laughter rining in his ears as Luffy wraps his rubber arms around him and Ace, and Ace has a his arm around Sabo's neck, ruffling his hair, and they're…they're so real…

"Ready to start the adventure?" Luffy asks him, his body practically vibrating with joy and Sabo laughs and nods.

"Of course, I'm ready for everything."

"We still have to decide on a jolly roger!" Luffy babbles, not loosening the hug one bit.

"That's true…"

"Oh, and there's something else! We almost forgot!"

"And what is that?" Sabo asks, ruffling Ace back and Ace laughs as his hair starts resembling a bird's nest, seriously, has he ever seen a comb in his life…? Ace winks at him and Sabo wonders why he doesn't talk, why is he letting Luffy do all the talking, but again, Sabo doesn't care, he's here, at home, with his two brothers, and they have a ship and they're about to set sail for the Grand Line…

Luffy grins. "Shishishi, did you forget? You're so silly, Sabo, because it's today! It's March 20! Happy Birthday, Sabo!" and he rips his eyes open, clutching his chest because he thinks his shirt will be soaked from blood pouring out of his body, because the pain is so big, so intense, like a bullet through his heart…

He sits up, breathing heavily, and digging his face into his sweaty but icy cold palms.

"Fuck…"

This dream…it's been way too real, it was so…so solid, so _real_ , he could feel them, he could feel Luffy's arms around his body, and Ace's arm around his neck, he…he could see their faces so clearly in front of him, he…why…

God, it's been so…easy...to loose himself in that fantasy… loose himself in this one thing he wishes for more than anything and yet it's the one thing he'll never have…

He bites his lip as the pain keeps pouring from his chest, and the pictures of the dream already slip away from under his fingertips, he's about to forget…

"Argh, fuck this!" he shouts, throwing his blanket away and standing up…

It's in the middle of the night, almost four in the morning. Oh yeah, it's his birthday. He feels his stomach turning around and a sour taste burns like acid in his mouth and he moves to the wash basin in his room, splashing cold water in his face.

"Fuck…shit…," he breathes into the silence of his room. Afterwards, he slumps against the bookshelf, trying to calm his aching heart, but in vain – it just gets worse with every passing second and he just desperately wishes he could return to this wonderful dream of his, to this magnificent fantasy…coming straight from the depths of his heart…showing him so mercilessly clearly just what he truly wishes for… and how much…

He rubs his temples. He needs…he needs… fresh air, yeah…to clear his head…

Thank god the hallway is completely empty as he quickly makes his way outside, onto the balcony, he needs to be alone, he wouldn't be able to bear seeing someone, hearing someone wishing him a happy birthday…

Sabo thinks he would start yelling…or crying…if he'd see someone right now…

Baltigo is like the land of the dead at night. Seriously, no one is outside once the sun has set and the calm wind carries the smell of ocean from the coast, up to where he is standing on the balcony. He can clearly see the port from here, pitch black against the calm water of the Grand Line, and the stars tonight, stronger than normally, shine down brilliantly, to break themselves in the restless breathing of the world's largest ocean.

He feels himself calming as he breathes in the clear air and he leans against the railing, his elbows on the flawless stone and he loses himself in wistfulness.

He's so…silly… Yeah, it's the right word… because he's smart enough to know that… well that his dream will never come true, no matter how much he wishes for it…and yet his silly heart refuses to let go and instead lets him live these vivid, wonderful dreams, only to wake up from them again eventually, with a crying heart and the sense of loss…and sadness…so strong, so intense, he wishes…he could just dream and not wake up again…

It's not like he hates being part of the revolutionary army but… after regaining his memories, he's found himself more and more drawn…away. Drawn to the idea of traveling again, freely, chasing a dream, on the wings of no less than absolute freedom…

He smiles to himself.

And yet, here he is, drowning in duties and…and responsibilities….and he can't leave, he owes these guys, he owes Dragon his life, so he must stay…

He's about to walk back to his room, when he notices movement down at the port. How weird…

Immediately, he's wide awake and alert – what if the enemy attacks…?!

He narrows his eyes, trying hard to make something out… Are…there are people down there…?

"Oh fuck everyone and my birthday," he growls as he looks around and then simply jumps over the balcony down to run over the narrow path down towards the port. Whoever it is, he'll be able to handle it himself and _god_ he'll make them _suffer_ for ruining this already fucked-up birthday even more, he'll break their bones and crush their skulls….

He knows the port like the back of his hand, and whoever it is, they are not being smart at all, why the hell did they anchor right in the middle of their port, who the hell is that dumb?

Come to think of it, where are the guys on watch? Everyone fast asleep?

Or…another, terrible thought strikes his mind, and he grits his teeth in anger. What if they've been infiltrated…?

He's almost at the pier, and he can already see the massive shadow of the foreign ship, black against the water, and he can hear voices – too many voices, fuck, _have_ they been infiltrated..?!

And then suddenly he hears a female voice bark: "Shhhht, everyone! They'll hear us!"

"I thought they know we're coming!"

"Yeah, but not everyone…"

Sabo's eyes widen and white hot rage starts pooling in his chest and he clenches both his hands to dragon claws, he'll fucking send these traitors to the gates of hell…

And then he hears another voice – and his heart starts aching with betrayal as he hears Koala, her cheerful voice so crystal clear it's like a slap in the face, say: "Guys, it's alright, take your time! We still got a few hours before sunrise!"

"Koala-chan, is it really ok if we anchor here?" the first female asks again.

"Yeah sure, this won't take long, I'm telling you!"

And Sabo can't stay silent anymore, he jumps out of the shadow, to where he can vaguely see Koala standing, and he tackles her to the ground.

"What the fuck, Koala?!" he yells, his voice on the verge of breaking.

"Gyyyaaahh, Sabo!" she screeches in surprise.

"What the fuck is going on?!" he barks, his left hand clenched around her shoulder, his right hand hovering in front of her face.

She doesn't look necessarily scared, mainly just surprised and a bit annoyed….seriously, but…?!

"Christ, Sabo, get off me, everything's ok!" she replies and tries to push him off, but Sabo doesn't move an inch.

"Tell me what's going on out here. You have 30 seconds," he growls.

"Waaah, Koala-chan!" he hears the first female shout and suddenly it's so bright, who the hell…?

All the flood lights that are usually only used if something important is happening down here, are switched on, enlightening the port brightly, as if during daylight and Sabo squints in the sudden glare, blinded for a second.

"Yo, get off her!" a male voice barks.

"Koala, twenty seconds left," Sabo growls and looks back at her.

His friend rolls her eyes. "You ruined your own surprise, baka."

He stares at her, speechless, and she points at the ship. "Look who it is."

And he lifts his gaze.

And he feels like the whole world…suddenly…smiles at him….

"Oh...my…god…"

And he gaps at the Thousand Sunny, the ship of the Strawhat crew, and he can see their faces, smiling and waving at him, except for the blond cook who is still yelling at him to get off Koala, and they…they're here…all of them…

"Wh – why are you all here?" he whispers, his voice near breaking.

"Silly, because it's your birthday," Koala smiles and he slowly stands up, helping Koala to her feet in the process, and he stares at his brother's friends…

"Where…?"

"Hang on, Robin is waking him up!" Nami yells down at him, a giant smile on her face. "He fell asleep after he couldn't sleep for days because he was so excited to see you!"

"But…?"

"It was my idea," Koala chuckles and Sabo stares at her.

"You…?"

"Yeah. We all know how much you hate your birthday. So I rang the strawhats. And we puzzled out this birthday surprise that you so perfectly ruined," she says amused.

"Koala…"

"Now stop looking like an idiot, you really think I don't know what you wish for?" she grins and pats his shoulder.

And he pulls her into a hug. Hard, full of emotion...she's...just the best friend...

"Thank you," he whispers into her shoulder and she laughs, patting his back.

"Now go greet your brother!"

And he turns around to see Luffy's nakama smile at him and then he hears _his_ voice, _finally_ …

" _SABO!_ " and a relieved laughter comes out of his throat and Sabo can see two hands suddenly gripping the railing of the ship, and then…

"Gomu gomu no… _HUG!_ " and Luffy flies toward him like a living, grinning torpedo, right into his arms, throwing him to the ground with enough force to press all air from his lungs and it's the best hug Sabo has ever gotten and he's…Luffy's…

Here, in his arms…

"Happy birthday, Sabo!" Luffy says happily, his face buried in his chest and his arms are ropped around him, and his little brother is…just…a living, breathing ball of energy…and he's here, with Sabo…

Sabo feels tears itching in the corners of his eyes.

"Thank you, Luffy," he says quietly and pulls Luffy even closer, burying his nose in the raven mess of hair.

This is…too good to be true…this must be a dream…

"I missed your last twelve birthdays!"

"Yeah, but –"

"So we have to celebrate a party that is as good as twelve birthday parties together!" Luffy yells happily and Sabo can't help but laugh as he lean back a bit to look into Luffy's flushed face.

"Ok, sounds good."

"We're ready for the party!" Usopp yells down from the Sunny.

"And then you'll come with us, right?" Luffy says and grins at him.

Sabo blinks. "Ah, no, Luffy, see…"

"But Koala said that you would!"

Sabo frowns and looks over at his friend.

"What?"

And the smile she passes him is… he's never seen her smile like that before. Both incredibly happy…and sad…at the same time.

"I talked to Dragon, Sabo. And he's ok with it. You've spend the last twelve years here. The debt is repaid."

"B-but!"

Koala laughs, although tears are shining in her eyes: "We want you to be happy, Sabo, we all do. But you won't be happy as long as you stay here."

"And that's why we're here. We'll celebrate and then you'll join my crew, yes?" Luffy says to him.

And Sabo doesn't know what to say. This…this is too much, he doesn't….what…is happening…?

He stares at his brother. And then back to Koala. And then back to Luffy.

"So…I…I'll be a pirate, after all?"

"Yeah, and you'll be with us!" Luffy replies and nods to his nakama.

And Sabo laughs. Laughs like he hasn't laughed in a long time, with all the burden…falling from his shoulders… It's like breathing again…for the first time in forever….

"Ok."

"But first, we need to _parteeeyyyy!_ " Luffy yells and his friends start cheering so loud half the island should be awake by now and Sabo smiles, his heart fluttering with excitement…and happiness he hasn't known for so long… He cups Luffy's cheek.

"Thank you, Luffy."

And his brother grins and leans their foreheads together.

"Of course!"

"And…thanks for…making this the best birthday ever."

"Shishishi, I'm glad you're happy, Sabo," Luffy says and hugs him again…

And this time… Sabo feels like there's the ghost of another hand on his shoulder… and in the corner of his eye he can see a face…freckles…and a smile, so genuine, the smile he's wanted to see…he's _needed_ to see…

Ace…

 _C'mon, Sabo, we're ready to set sail…_


End file.
